Respect the Metal

August 17, 2007

Manowar - Kings of Metal

Hmmm, apparently Manowar kicked Frodo’s ass to get ‘the ring of power.’

Respect the metal or we’ll bring democracy to your country.

God bless America.

That’s a belt buckle even Garth Brooks could covet.

And continuing in a trend of bad elementary school flashbacks, Bennett says:

I think I used that ring as a flotation device in the kiddie pool.

What is metal’s obsession with big ass swords and spray-on tights?

Bennett, noting the flags, says:

Poor France!

I don’t really feel that bad for France.

Stormwalker Says:

I wouldn’t expect hipster #$&!^$ like the kind who run this pitiful excuse for a website to understand true heavy metal. As if the #$!% you people listen to isn’t trite, ridiculous, and completely derivative. It’s hypocrisy at its best, courtesy of @#$%^! with emo haircuts and $180 jeans.

Ben Says:

We are not worthy to lick the rabbit fur-lined moon boot nor tie the stretchy hem of of the spandex onesie of Lord Stormwalker.

Mark Says:

Metal is eternal, and you are the turd that has already been digested and $@#! out not even in a proper turd receptacle, but swept under a storm drain because the being who performed the process to @#!$ you out was a homeless lactose intolerant crackhead with diabetes on a strictly corn diet! Nevertheless, you are a turd on crack, I hope this clears up any confusion about metal music.

Ben Says:

Someone’s been listening to too much smooth jazz.

Leave a Reply

Page 1 of 11