It’s JIMMY CARTER!

Bert cannot count to five.

And this here is a fine example of scurvy and the Neolithic forehead structure in the inbred middle-aged male.

What instrument is he playing there?

He’s playing the stars.

He’ll be playing the slots too in an hour, apparently.

The epic bell-bottoms enhance Tony’s stability, but have resulted in his disqualification from “Lounge Limbo” competitions all across Vegas.

Oh, I love Charades! Wait, is he a gay Chuck Norris impersonator in an off-broadway production of Saturday Night Fever??

Here’s a quarter Gary, call someone who cares

I’ll throw in a buck if it will go towards his bus ticket back to the Land of Too Tight Pants.

Genghis Khan, The Musical! reimagined by some Russian guys that truly loved ABBA. There are some epic mustaches in this video, by the way. Glad they didn’t reimagine that part of history.