This Boat Don’t Float

August 18, 2007

Boat Diddley

Check out the musical selection from this album.

Boat Diddley? Is that a play on words?

I think I saw him on Bassmasters last week.

The scary part is that the “2006” in the album title dates this accurately within the past half-century. This was straight-up designed in Microsoft Word.

Battle for the bayou: Swamp Dogg vs. Boat Diddley.

Yeah, winner rides away on a huge white rat.

Was he a guest referee in Bud Bowl V?

The greatest tragedy in this man’s life was when they shut the Dairy Queen. He even wrote a song about it.

… listening to the Dairy Queen song …

“Hot fudge judgement… and soft whispers”? All I know is that it takes a lot of “hot fudge judgement” to build a body like that.

This a proud headliner in our “Southern Comfort” category for a REASON! Where else would someone write a love song to the Dairy Queen?


Trees Talk Too

August 17, 2007

Geraldine and Ricky

Good LORD! She is the new puppet master.

I don’t think even Chucky would want to play with little Ricky.

This stuff is just spooky.

Judge, I swear, I didn’t kill him… it was LITTLE RICKY!

The happy couple on their honeymoon in Jamaica.

I saw Ricky perform on the MOTOCROSS last week… and he was BADASS! (Queue Elvis entry music, animated flashing neon signs of RICKY!)


Scarlet Vinyl Pants


Bobby Womack - The Poet

Check out the musical selection from this album.

I would like to remind our readers that while Bobby may appear to be enfolded in pink lace, it is, in fact, "tulle"––which is very, very different.

(Dear Reader: It shouldn’t be surprising to you after that last comment that Darren is the only married member of the Incredulous Four, and the only one domesticated enough to make such a hopelessly sissy observation. A thousand pardons.)

I bet you could make a sweet couch out of those pants.

This reminds me of when I was forced to juggle scarves in elementary school P.E. It was like the happy hands club.

Ben notes Mr. Womack’s stunning resemblance to Urkel.



Respect the Metal


Manowar - Kings of Metal

Hmmm, apparently Manowar kicked Frodo’s ass to get ‘the ring of power.’

Respect the metal or we’ll bring democracy to your country.

God bless America.

That’s a belt buckle even Garth Brooks could covet.

And continuing in a trend of bad elementary school flashbacks, Bennett says:

I think I used that ring as a flotation device in the kiddie pool.

What is metal’s obsession with big ass swords and spray-on tights?

Bennett, noting the flags, says:

Poor France!

I don’t really feel that bad for France.

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