Bagpipes and midgets. Modern cabaret at its best.

Formerly of Merve and the Midgetones. (Great, now I’m going to be killed in my sleep by a midget.)

Why is Joshua dressed like a prehistoric cave hobo?

In announcer voice: ‘BEFORE he was an American Idol he worshiped ANOTHER IDOL!’

Wait, is he baring his navel?!? No wonder he lost…

Thou shalt not wear a wireless mic in the wilderness.

If Joshua is wearing eye shadow and pink lip gloss, I don’t want to know what Moses’ getup is. This must be the Scorsese version where the cast from Rent does bible stories.

I prefer this ‘Quest For Fire’ look to what he’s got now.

Is anyone listening? Not if we can possibly help it…

Francine has got class.

I am embarrassed to admit it, but I once watched an hour of her show on Public Access TV during a trip to LA. I am now attending weekly therapy to help heal the trauma, and if any of you would like to join me I’m going to go cry softly in the corner and try to get back to my happy place now.

Francine, does your mom know where you are and what you’re doing?

Please… please fast forward.

If you think about it, this is a great way to get in shape!

Take it from these guys. Don’t stop moving your shoulders or head. EVER.

What’s with the exploding yellow snow?

Nowiy, nowiy, nowiy, NOOOO!!