Remember, children, that’s “Swamp Dogg” with two “g’s” and a big…white…rat.

(Pointing) He’s riding bareback!

For the record, I’m against interspecies dating.

For the record, I’m against that shirt!

“I’M THE KING OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!” Actually, no,
I’m the king of the swamp.

That rat survived Chernobyl.

Anyone ever seen The Secret of Nimh?

Rat On! RAT ON! RAT ON!

It’s interesting to note that she must be left handed, because she has a baseball bat within easy reach on that side.

Man, J-Lo’s mom is hardcore. No wonder Ben Afleck dumped her.

She’s batting 1.000.

Has anyone even tasted St. Ides?

Actually, it turns out that St. Ides comes in a whole bunch of fruit flavors. Don’t ask how I know this…

I love you, Mom.

NO!!!!!

Only wearing gloves.

…rubber gloves.

Matching gray polyester suits: $29.99. Matching horn-rim glasses: $12.05. Forty-five years in prison: priceless.

“Charcoal gray” rules.

But they look so happy!

I have a dirty mind and I’m just going to keep my mouth shut on this one.

AMEN!

Boat Diddley? Is that a play on words?

I think I saw him on Bassmasters last week.

The scary part is that the “2006” in the album title dates this accurately within the past half-century. This was straight-up designed in Microsoft Word.

Battle for the bayou: Swamp Dogg vs. Boat Diddley.

Yeah, winner rides away on a huge white rat.

Was he a guest referee in Bud Bowl V?

The greatest tragedy in this man’s life was when they shut the Dairy Queen. He even wrote a song about it.

“Hot fudge judgement… and soft whispers”? All I know is that it takes a lot of “hot fudge judgement” to build a body like that.

This a proud headliner in our “Southern Comfort” category for a REASON! Where else would someone write a love song to the Dairy Queen?